每年,在申请季结束后,机构都会搜集一些优质文书进行分享。今年我们又选取了一些被顶级名校录取的文书,供大家参考学习。
我们可以在这些文书中,感受到学生们对于生活的敏感,深刻的洞察力和有意思的古怪想法。
想知道名校到底青睐什么样的文书?下面就一起来看看被芝加哥大学录取的学生的优质文书,来感受一下名校的文书标准吧。
芝大文书分享
Through the mist of dust came a line of crimson trucks. Their wheels rolled on the dirty road, crushed the cement on the ground, and stirred up more dust. Flying gravels of quartz turned grey the cornstalks, weeds, dry earth, and my cheeks.
漫天尘雾中,一排深红车的大卡车列队驶来。车轮碾过肮脏的道路,压碎地上的水泥,扬起更多灰尘。飞舞的石英渣给秸秆、杂草、干裂的泥土与我的脸颊都蒙上一层灰色。
Looking up along the road, I saw blasted mountains, half green, half grey. In the village where I was conducting my field research, illegal mining was the cancer of the local economy.
沿路抬头望去,山峦已被炸毁,绿色中掺着灰色。在我做田野调查的这个村子里,非法采矿已成为当地经济的毒瘤。
Shall I blame these drivers, who mined and transported the minerals on the highway? Fixing my eyes on the crimson trucks, I wondered.
我盯着这来来往往的深红色调,高速公路上掘挖、运送矿石的司机们,该指责他们吗?
Stuck onto the windshield of the first truck was a sheet of paper that read an obscure Chinese character. I was told it meant protection fees had already been paid to the traffic police. Shall the police be the culprit, then? Why would no one stop this corrupt deal among the local government, illegal miners, and traffic police?
第一辆卡车的挡风玻璃上贴着一张纸,上面写着一个隐晦的汉字。他们说这是已经给交警交过了保护费的意思。那么警察是罪魁祸首?当地政府、非法采矿者和交警之间的一腐败交易为什么无人制止?
I strenuously sought solutions in my mind. Rules can only be revised at each tiny point in society, argued Michele Foucault. Can that be the answer?
我绞尽脑汁思考。福柯说:规则只能在社会的每个细小枝节被修缮。这是理想答案吗?
However, weeks of research in the villages revealed to me that every problem was a tip of an iceberg. “My children’s tuition bills and my parents’ medical bills are draining my income,” a truck driver once told me, while illegal mining had already polluted the soil, making it impossible to till his land. How do I, or anyone else, unravel this knot of knots, when all the points are intertwined?
但长达数周的调研告诉我,每一个我看到的问题,都只是巨大冰山在海面上露出之一角。“上有老,下有小,收入早被学费和医疗费榨干了,”一位卡车司机这样告诉我,与此同时,非法采矿正在污染土壤,使土地使用难以为继。当所有的点缠绕在一起,这结谁能解,是我吗?
I went to the villages to find out problems in villagers’ life. But I came home disillusioned about the usefulness of knowledge. Too huge a gap seems to exist between theory and reality. After my return from the country, I’d stare at a random object and doubt the value of what I have learnt. There has to be an answer! If not, what’s the use of learning the humanities and social sciences, expecting to use them to help people? The crimson trucks strode down the dirty road again and again in my mind, reminding me of my failure.
我进一步深入村庄,了解村里人的生活。走后,幻灭占据了我对知识有效性的所有期望。坐在家中,我感受着理论与现实间过于巨大的沟壑。我会突然盯着家中一个物件,质疑所学一切的价值。总得有个答案吧!我们学人文、社会科学,指望助人,若非如此,这些学习还有什么用呢?深红色的车队已然成了我心中关于个人失败的一片阴翳。
Days passed. Confusion kept haunting me. Yet, as I read more case studies in sociology and public policy, I finally realized that my laments were invalid. Reading Yaojiang Shi’s careful analysis of the effect of parental migration on the academic performance of their children, I realized my naivete in trying to connect the complicated structure of China’s rural problems to my simplistic understanding of Durkheim, Marx, and Foucault. It’s not that theory and reality are disconnected. It’s that I naively equated theory with book knowledge, but a good theory is more than metaphysical musing.
日子一天天过去,困惑依然挥之不去。即便,在阅读社会学、公共政策的更多个案研究后,我终于明白了这种指责并不成立:针对中国农民工父母对子女学业成绩的影响,史耀疆教授展开了细致的研究。读完他的论文,我意识到了自己在妄图通过对涂尔干、马克思、福珂这些社会学大家的浅表理解,来贯穿中国复杂农村问题的结构性版图,这一宏图是如此幼稚。理论与现实并不脱钩,只是理论不可与书本知识简单划等号——经得起考验的理论远不止形而上的冥思。
How should I connect theory and reality? I read and reflected. I was eventually enlightened by John Dewey: “Experience gives me want; knowledge makes it a purpose.” In retrospect, this has been the cycle of my life. I read; I became unsatisfied with abstract knowledge; I went into the world and found problems; I went back to books to seek solutions. If there is still a path to get answer for my questions on rural construction, that is to obtain more knowledge and experience.
那么,理论与经验的有机的结合该如何实现呢?在阅读中,我不断反思。最终,约翰·杜威(译注:美国实用主义哲学家)启发了我:“是经验让我有所欲;是知识将它塑造为目的。”回过头看,这句话仿佛就是我成长的年轮(意译,原文为In retrospect, this has been the cycle of my life):出于对抽象知识的不满足,我走入真实世界,发现问题;我走回书本,寻求答案。如果在回应我关于(中国)乡土构建的智识追问时,依然有径可依,那么它只能是通过汲取更多的知识和经验。
So I went to the villages again, seeking more experience to guide my learning.
于是,我再一次回到曾经调研的村庄,寻求指导求知的更多经验材料。
In a villager’s home, I was sitting by a birch table, facing the door. On my left sat the village head; on my right, thevillager. White steam rose from the rice and met the cigarette smoke from the village head’s mouth. Through this medley of mist, I saw, outside the door, lines of green rice shoots waving in the field. Peace, for the first time, was in my mind. I no longer worried about the limits of my knowledge; experience would lead me to replenish it.
在一位当地人的家中,我坐在一张桦木饭桌上,面向大门。村长坐在我左手边,村民们在我右边。蒸大米的白烟与村长嘴里吐出的烟圈交汇在一起。透过这迷蒙的雾气,我看到门外田野里一排排绿色的稻苗在摇曳。我心中第一次出现了安宁之感:不再担忧知识的局限性,经验终将提供补充。
The crimson trucks finally stopped roaring in my brain.
我心绪中深红色的淤塞终于消散了。
顾问评析
这是一篇以非法采矿的申请者调研成为文章的主题和核心tension的主文书。中间不断地反问和思考,顺便展现了自己深厚的社科理论功底以及调研发现的问题的复杂性。
自己开始对于理论的有效性产生怀疑,展现出内心的挣扎。既学术又没有把文书写成论文,用阅读、观察、活动,反思去探讨理论和现实之间的复杂关系。
一个漂亮的quote提拉文章主题,表达理论和经验都很重要,不是说理论没用,只是自己现在田野经验还不足,高中生可以到达这样的深度太不容易了。
最后一段,问题和内心的挣扎完美告一段落,自己在对于世界的理解和智识方面都获得了长足的成长。深入浅出,天花板级别的学术类ps。